Late last year, we took a trip around Japan and during that time, I ate a couple of burgers. From what I could understand, the burger scene over there isn’t quite like what we have in Glasgow, but I had a few places noted in my phone and was determined to make it to each one – including Burger King.
Why, you ask? In Japan, Burger King decided to roll out a black burger (or ‘Kuro’ Burger) for the month of October, complete with black bun, cheese, everything. Since I’m up for trying most things once, I decided to give it a shot.
It’s now April. 6 months since we set off for Japan. I’m not sure why it’s taken me so long to write about my Burger King experience in Tokyo. Maybe I’ve tried to erase it from my memory? Or perhaps I’ve simply struggled to express, in writing, how I feel about this burger.
Ordering food in Japan can be tricky at times. It was nowhere near as difficult as I had feared prior to visiting, but when it came to extensive menus, at times I found myself being that irritating tourist and pointing at what I wanted whilst smiling and giving a look of ‘I’m so sorry’. We stopped by Burger King in Shibuya for one reason and one reason only – to try out the Black Burger. I pointed my way through the order process and a few minutes later the burger was on the table in front of me.
Unwrapping the burger, I really didn’t know what to expect. ‘Would it really be black? Even the cheese?’, ‘would it look the same as it does in the photos?’ and ‘will it taste different?’. These were all thoughts running through my head.
I was sure to order fries too, incase I couldn’t eat the thing.
My first thoughts on looking at the burger up close and in-person were that it looked a bit…boring. And absolutely disgusting. I could see the black cheese poking out from the bun, so I was keen to get a closer look.
To be frank, as I lifted up the top bun, pretty much all curiosity I had for this burger went out the window. It was a slimy, vile-looking mess. It looked like someone had taken the most evil cartoon character you could imagine and melted them down into a pile of gloop. Before even taking my first bite, I was already regretting the entire decision.
With fear in my eyes, I decided to take my first bite into the limp, gloopy pile of sadness that sat in front of me, as my two dining companions giggled with glee.
It was as depressing and unsatisfying as it looks in the photo above. The texture was strange and gristly and the black cheese was probably the most unsatisfying cheese I’ve ever eaten. It was also completely flavourless. A big ball of tasteless slime and easily one of the worst burgers I’ve ever eaten. And that’s coming from a guy who ate a burger in Charlie Rocks on Byres Road, back when it was still in business!
In short, if you’re ever in Japan around October – spend your money elsewhere and thank me later. Lets just hope that Burger King don’t ever decide to bring this evil in a bun to our shores.
Here’s a wee snap that I took at the Shibuya crossing to take your mind off of the horror you’ve just read about.
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LEGAL / COPYRIGHT INFORMATION: ALL Photography by PAMELA GRAHAM PHOTOGRAPHY. Copyright of Pamela Graham & Pamela Graham Photography. All Rights Reserved.